No Ephs or Cays

Moveable type magazine

In the olden days of moveable metal type, this might actually have happened.

To Our Valued Customers:

Unphortunately, a situation has arisen at our typesetting phoundry that necessitates my writing this letter.

Through some uncaynown series oph events, all ephs and cays have disappeared phrom the shop. We do not  yet caynow how this happened, but a phull investigation is underway.

Meanwhile, we are phorced to improvise; the only solution is to substitute the letters “ph” and “cay” phor the missing ephs and cays, respectively. We hope that this is only a minor inconvenience to you. Please pheel phree to call us baccay iph you can thincay oph a more suitable arrangement.

We are trying to be up-phront and phorthright with all oph our valued clients; but due to circumstances beyond our control, at the time oph this writing, we anticipate a two-weecay baccay order bephore the replacement phonts arrive phrom our aphphiliated phoundries.

Again, we apologize phor this problem, and want you to caynow that we are worcaying around the cloccay to phind an answer. Please bear with us, and caynow we loocay phorward to continuing our relationship with you in the phuture.

Iph you thincay this is phunny, it is not. This is a not a jocaye, and should be loocayed at licaye the problem that it is. This is a serious aphphair!

Many thancays,
Phrancay Caynight,
Caynight Phoundry and Typesetting

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